Date: 26 Jun 89 15:43:31 GMT
From: rtravsky@OUTLAW.UWYO.EDU (Richard Travsky)
Subject: ST:TNG The Lost Episodes
Newsgroups: rec.arts.sf-lovers

Below are some episode outlines and summaries of ST:TNG that have never been shown. They were found in an anti-time capsule, i.e., a time capsule that travels back in time.

		T H E   L O S T   E P I S O D E S
                ~ ~ ~   ~ ~ ~ ~   ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

Episodes we'll never see (lost or otherwise)...

A Conflict Of Priorities

Worf converts to Judaism and turns in his Klingon battle sash for a yarmulka and prayer shawl. Some scenes reflect the difficulties Worf encounters as a result of his new faith, such as refusing to eat pork in the officer's mess and wanting to be circumcised (Doctor Pulaski: "Both of them?"). Matters come to a head when the Romulans attack right after the Sabbath starts and Worf refuses to fire the phasers. Picard must find a way to save the Enterprise and still respect Worf's religious beliefs.

Coming Of Age

Counselor Troi has an urgent meeting with Picard about the rapidly maturing Wesley Crusher (Troi: "I sense in Wesley... yearnings. Longings. Uneasiness. Giddiness. Trepidation." etc.) Wesley's personal crisis comes while the Enterprise is making emergency deliv- eries of an antidote to Waldheimer's Disease to Star Base XYZZY. Picard, remembering that he was once Wesley's age, orders Riker to take Wesley to the Star Base and get him laid.

Where No Love Has Gone Before

While Picard is taking a nap, Riker takes command of the Enterprise and declares war on every known civilization in the galaxy. Picard awakes after Riker has pho-torped several planets into rubble and destroyed countless passing starships. Relieved by Picard, Riker says he did it all to impress Jodie Foster. Picard must find a way to stave off intergalactic war and reprisals against the Enterprise and yet not unduly interfere in his officer's personal life.

This Space for Rent

Massive budget cutbacks have been initiated by Star Fleet. The Enterprise is forced to sell advertising space on the large surfaces of the ship (Romulan Ale, STP, Burma Shave, etc.). Further indignities follow: a McDonald's is to be established at Ten Forward ( "Over 10**42 Sold!" ). Picard must find a way to prevent this and find new sources of funding for Star Fleet, but his loyalties are strongly tested when informed that officers will get free Big Macs.

Fall Guy

Someone glues a Groucho nose and mustache to Geordie's visor and he doesn't notice for a really long time. Humiliated, and embarassed by his shipmates' cruel taunts, Geordie locks himself in engineering and threatens to blow up the ship. Picard, who was the one who glued the nose and mustache to the visor, must find a way to calm Geordie down and pin the blame on someone else.

Are We Not Men?

For what seems like the zillionth time, Data goes on one of his "am I human or what" jags. Annoying everyone on the ship with his endless whining (thus lowering crew efficiency, etc.), Picard again consoles Data, reflecting that "anyone this irritating must be human".

Special Orders Don't Upset Us

Dr. Pulaski, concerned by an overall increase in the average weight of the crew, decides to implement a ship-wide diet. She comes up with a diet that's less filling. The artificially intelligent bio- medical computer disagrees, coming up with a diet that tastes great. There ensues a long and tedious argument between the Doctor and the computer which doesn't really settle anything. Picard, along with the rest of the crew, elects to eat at the McDonald's that was established at Ten Forward in the episode "This Space For Rent".

Not Again

The Enterprise encounters an incredibly really really super advanced race of beings who can do whatever the hell they want when they want. And they do. Picard lets them.

Crossroads

The Enterprise encounters a ragtag fleet of spaceships escorting a large black monolith who are searching for the lost planet V-GER. Picard must make the most important decision he's ever faced: how much longer is he going to put up with this nonsense?

Wesley Crusher is

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